Hate networking?

(c) iStockPhoto/iqoncept

I used to absolutely HATE networking. I would avoid it like the plague. But back in 2004 I changed my mind about networking. I changed the way I thought about networking so it changed the way I behaved when I decided to go to an event. I was working exclusively at home at the time.

I decided to figure out what about networking I didn’t like. I hated the small talk. The attempt to talk to a large amount of people and get a bunch of business cards. 90% of whom I never reached out to after the event. Pointless right? The whole reason to go to a networking event is to MEET people. So why wasn’t I following up? Or meeting people with whom I had any chemistry?

Well for starters I wasn’t honoring the fact that I’m an introvert and I was attending too many events. Which guaranteed I’d fail. Why? Well I was brain dead by the time I got to my third event of the week. Who can focus much less carry on a conversation when just being in the room is driving you nuts because you need some quiet.

I started to be more picky about which events I attended. I also gave myself permission to leave early if I felt like it. Why force myself to stay when I’m not enjoying myself? I’d be irritable and quiet – not exactly the way to be if you are looking to connect with people.

So I set myself a goal, I’d aim to connect one on one with at least five people and after that I was free to leave. I wasn’t in the business of collecting business cards just to prove I met a ton of people. I am in the business of creating relationships. Networking is about creating relationships not about numbers. Until you have the relationship thing down the numbers don’t matter.

Nothing is more irritating than someone you barely know trying to sell you something. There is no trust yet. Why would you buy what they are selling? Or how about not talking to someone for months and then asking them for job leads. Annoying right?

Whether networking online/in-person being authentic is important.

What I’ve learned over the years:

• Give without expecting anything in return
• Stay in touch. Sure email is great but a quick phone call or handwritten note are great too
• Be genuinely interested in the other person’s goals
• Ask how you can help
• Go early to events
• It’s not about quantity of connections but the quality of them
• Eat before you go so you aren’t hovering over the buffet table
• Bring business cards. Sounds crazy to put that on the list but you’d be surprised at how many times I’ve been with people at an event who didn’t have business cards on them. Even if you are unemployed you still need them. There is the old standby Vistaprint but also consider Moo or Expressionery
• Forward jobs that aren’t a good fit for you to others even if they aren’t actively looking. You never know it might be their dream job
• Know when to move on. Relationships are a two street. If the other person isn’t interested don’t keep trying. It is best to move on to someone who is interested in making a connection. Yes, the rejection will sting but dragging it out is pointless
• Go to events that are outside of your industry. It’s easy to stick with groups and organizations that are about your field.
• Online networking is a good place to start but try to take the connection offline too

Lessons Learned: Self Promotion for Introverts

(c) iStockPhoto/ayzek

In May, I took the two week course taught by Nancy Ancowitz on Self-Promotion for Introverts at New York University. I had heard Nancy speak on the topic in March as well which is why I decided to take her course. Seminars are great but I like taking longer classes as they give me the opportunity to spend more time on a topic, do more research and ask more questions after I’ve had time to think about the material.
Success is something most of us hope to achieve but without self-promotion we will most likely not achieve our true potential. As an introvert I know there is nothing I hate more than listening to someone brag about their accomplishments. It’s boring and obnoxious which is probably why most introverts hate self-promotion. We are under the misguided notion that self-promotion equals bragging.

It doesn’t.

Self-promotion is a dialogue not a monologue. Most bragging tends to be a monologue of one person trying to impress the other with his/her accomplishments. In most cases they aren’t interested in the other person at all and are dominating the conversation. Trying to sell themselves by any means necessary. Most people hate bragging.

(c) iStockPhoto/robynmac

Self-promotion is about being authentic, creating a dialogue, stating the facts without embellishment and creating connections. To do it well you must know what is holding you back from effective self-promotion. You must understand what makes you unique – your strengths and weakness, even your quirks.

It’s not about selling your soul to the highest bidder. It is about figuring out what you offer the world and letting the world know that you exist. Most people right or wrong prefer to work with people they like. Find out why people have hired you in the past or why they did for your current position. You can use that information in promoting yourself. Figure out what makes you great at your job.

I know there are parts of my job I love and there are others I hate so much I’d rather go to the dentist.

Being a visual learner I created a mindmap of the “Self-Promotion for Introverts” class recently. It contains what I felt were some important take aways. If you want to learn more you can take Nancy’s class in October, read her book – Self-Promotion for Introverts: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead or checkout her blog.

Download Self-promotion for Introverts Class Mindmap

What I learned during “Presentation Skills for Introverts”

In April I took “Presentation Skills for Introverts” taught by Nancy Ancowitz the author of Self-Promotion for Introverts: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead. Click on the mind map image above to enlarge the image. The map highlights the key points that I took away from the course. Presenting is a skill that we all need but requires practice to master. During the course I got to practice not only the verbals but the non-verbals skills of presenting.

The instructor, Nancy Ancowitz has a section in her book that covers presentation skills but she also recommends the following books – The Exceptional Presenter: A Proven Formula to Open Up and Own the Room and How to Write and Give a Speech, Second Revised Edition.

There is another session of the class starting Thursdays, 6/10 and 6/17 at 6:30-9:30 p.m.
at New York University’s Washington Square campus. The cost is $110. To register – http://bit.ly/czeJFy

Dowload Presentation Skills for Introverts Mind Map

Why do so many fear presenting more than death?

(c) iStockPhoto/kabliczech

Presenting to an audience can instill all kinds of fears for some many people. The imagination can create havoc with reality. Odds are you aren’t going to pass out or forget everything you have to say. But if you think you are you probably will. It’s that whole self-fulfilling prophecy at work.
I have fears about public speaking and I’ve been an instructor both in-person and online. I recently signed up for “Presentations Skills for Introverts” taught by Nancy Ancowitz , a course that she teaches at New York University.
The biggest take aways are that practice is necessary to get better. If you’re introverted you need to figure out what makes you comfortable in front of an audience. Does size matter? Do you prefer smaller groups to larger groups? Some people find presenting to people they don’t know easier than presenting to those that they do.
Watch other presenters. No one is perfect. Even presenters that we think are good have weaknesses. It was great to be in an environment where I got feedback on my strengths as well as the areas I need to work on.
Here’s my presentation from our last class -

Self Promotion for Introverts as presented by Nancy Ancowitz

Today I attended a talk by Nancy Ancowitz entitled Self Promotion for Introverts at In Good Company. Nancy has written a book by the same name which was published last year. It has lots of great tips and suggestions that can work for both introverts and extroverts. Check out the PDF of my mindmap of the presentation.

Mindmap of Nancy Ancowitz’s presentation

How to talk about what you do

Also known as your elevator pitch. I read in Michael Port’s book titled, Book Yourself Solid, that the reason most entrepreneurs fail is that they cannot explain what they do to potential clients. Your job title isn’t what you do either. Telling people I’m a user experience designer results in “huh?! what is that?” even using the more widely used term “information architect” or “ interaction designer” means nothing to people outside the industry.

So how do you talk about what you do without confusing people?

There is a simple formula to start with “I help…” and what ever it is you do for your target market. Another way according to IIise Benun, author of Self Promotion Online, is to come up with a 10 word blurb in various ways. First by asking the questions “What do you do”, then “For whom” and finally “What do they get”. You then write the blurb from the problem-solving perspective.

Your “who and do what” is an important part of your marketing strategy. If you can’t explain what you do to someone they won’t see any value in your services.

Spending time crafting different ways of explaining what you do to others is important. It helps you focus on who you really want to work with and what your target audience needs to hear in order to trust you.

Human-centered design for the rest of us

What exactly does it mean for a site to be human-centered?

It means that you don’t have to look at the site and wonder what it is supposed to accomplish. What am I supposed do now?

A site that leaves you wondering why hasn’t achieved it’s goal. The action should be so bright you need to wear shades to not know what you’re supposed to do.

What story does a site/product tell? Is it clear? If it isn’t how can you fix it? Sit down and ask yourself what your audience might think.

Do a “What’s in it for me” a.k.a WIIFM analysis to see what your audience thinks your site is. If it fails that test you know you need to rework your site.

Your message isn’t clear.

Not to worry you can fix it. Put yourself in the position of what your potential visitor is looking for and why they are coming to your site. Make up a little story about what you want your visitor to do and that will help inform your design decisions.

The journey of writing a business plan, Part 2

On Monday I wrote about creating my business plan. The next hurdle for me is figuring out what services to offer. Sure, I could offer a ton of services but I’ll get better results overall if I focus. My business plan is created using scrapbook paper, stickers and clippings from magazines.

I currently have services listed on my site but I want to fine tune my offerings. Trying to be all things to all people is not my goal. Being a jack of all trades…master of none isn’t good for the wallet. I would bet that most generalists would agree with me with few exceptions.

A lot of business books talk about how hard it is for people to pick a target market for their services. This I can say with honestly is totally true. You do feel like you are giving up something. But that is a scarcity mentality. You can’t service every single market.

Everyone does not need your services.

So I’m working on narrowing my focus and redefining my strategy. Having it all out of my head and on paper makes the task of work on my business plan that much easier.

Growing a consulting practice without some kind of plan would have been  a waste of time.

The 12 Most Persuasive Words in the English Language

If you are trying to get a point across or just have something to share. The following words can help you get your message heard

1. You
2. Money
3. Save
4. New
5. Results
6. Easy
7. Health
8. Safety
9. Love
10. Discovery
11. Proven
12. Guarantee

Use these words wisely. And don’t forget to say “Thank You” when someone does something nice for you, it’s another powerful phrase.

Neuromarketing

What exactly IS Neuromarketing? The simplest answer is that it is where brain science and marketing meet.

The puffspeak for what Neuromarketing is goes something like this -

Neuromarketing:
A technique that measures how consumers will react to brands and advertising. The brain is mapped, using functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging to record conscious and subconscious responses to advertising, products or brands.

So why would anyone care about this emerging field?

Well in this economy getting people to spend on anything is tough. Most people have been hard hit buy the recession and if they are going to spend money on a product/service the value add has to be apparent or they aren’t going to buy.

There are three parts to the brain -

The new brain that thinks. It processes rational data. The middle brain feels. It processes emotions and gut feelings.The old brain decides. It takes into account the input from the other two brain, but the old brain is the actual trigger of decision

Neuromarketing: Understanding the Buy Buttons in Your Customer’s Brain

The old brain makes all the decisions regardless of how advanced we are as a society. In a recession people are more likely to think more carefully about what product/service they buy. However, if the product/service you are selling fulfills a need they will buy regardless of the economic climate.

Resources to learn more about Neuromarketing:
Martin Lindstrom
The Brain: Marketing To Your Mind
neurosciencemarketing.com/blog/
Neuromarketing Ning Group